I can’t believe the year it’s been, I feel as if I’ve run a marathon of a year. But the thing about time is that it just keeps on going. My main worry at the moment is Jed, I don’t know how we’re going to manage to get him back here so that he can do his A Levels, it’s such a shame, he worked so hard and did so well, but I don’t suppose you ever get everything you want.
God – only one more page of my diary, and I can’t be arsed to write anything today.
Finally heard from Jed today, he says that he’s OK and he’s at his Nan’s but he’s not sure what to do yet, he said that he knew he definitely couldn’t come back to his Dad’s. I asked when we’d see him again, but he said he didn’t know and wasn’t very chatty, he sounded awful. I spoke to Imogen later and said that if he wouldn’t come to see us, we should go and see him. She said that there wasn’t anything that we could do, but I said we weren’t sure of that and surely there was something, and anyway, we had to go and see him, he sounded really bad. We’re trying to make a plan but everything is getting busy at the moment, we’ve got bloody Funkster and then college starts in a week.
I’m really impressed with Mum, she ignored what I said and went round to speak to Jed’s Dad, or at least, she tried. He told her to “Fuck off and mind her own business.” Mum said, “the man is an ape, no, that’s an insult to apes,” I cracked up; she was in a real temper. She said that he behaved like an idiot and that “people like that shouldn’t be allowed children.” She’s not wrong there. I had assumed that Steve had gone with her but she didn’t take him, I think she thought if she turned up with a man it would enrage Jed’s Dad further.
I told Mum about the situation with Jed and asked her if there was anything that we could do. I meant could we put him up, but she said straight away that we couldn’t, we didn’t have the space and anyway it was a bad idea. When I asked her why it was a bad idea, she said that he wasn’t our responsibility and she couldn’t take on the commitment – commitment, he wouldn’t be much of a commitment, he’s quite self-sufficient. She said that she would go round and see if she could talk to Jed’s Dad about it, but I said that maybe that wasn’t the best idea. I don’t want him to lose his temper with Mum.
So much for that idea, Imogen woke up to find a note from Jed saying thanks for putting him up, but he’d gone to his Nan’s and he’d get in touch in a couple of days. It feels awful, it’s as if a part of our lives has finished and we’re really worried about him. He was so angry last night, it’s as if he feels that he did all that work for nothing. There was a teacher who said that the important thing about exams was that once you had them nobody could take them away from you. But I think Jed’s Dad has managed that.
Just when I thought everything was going really well again it all seems to fall apart. Jed turned came to the pub with a load of bags. He’s had the biggest row ever with his Dad; he seems to think it is the biggest row because it didn’t have any violence in it. His Dad doesn’t want him to go on to the sixth form, he says that he should get a job and earn his keep and that A Levels aren’t for the likes of their family. Jed tried to stick to his guns but his Dad wasn’t having any of it, he said that either Jed got a job or he was out of the house. Imogen and I said that it would all blow over like it did before, but Jed’s convinced it won’t. He’s got nowhere to stay tonight; I said I’d have a word with my Mum and that he could stay with us. But Imogen said he should go to hers because her Dad wouldn’t even notice. Jed said that he would tonight but then he’d have to go to his Nan’s because that was the only place he had to go. I felt really sick when he said this, I really didn’t want him to go, I’d really miss him. When he went to the toilet Imogen and I said that if we could keep him here for a few days maybe things would sort themselves out so we set about trying to talk him in to it. But the thing with Jed is, he’s a really stubborn person, when he makes his mind up about something it takes ages to shift it. In the end we had to give up and decided to have another after he’d slept on it.
I’m beginning to think that I’ll have to watch my drinking, I’ve been doing so much of it and it seems to be mushing my brain. The trouble is, there isn’t much else to do apart from going to the pub, there’s going to see a film or there is bowling, but that’s a bus ride away. Anyway, off to the pub tonight to continue celebrating!!
Had a great night at the pub last night, it was just a celebration, we had to all keep our voices down about what we were celebrating for in case we got chucked out for being under age. I think they must know in there that we’re underage, but they turn a blind eye. Not surprised really since we spend quite a lot in there, and there is hardly ever any trouble. Jed was like a gladiator; he almost swaggered with confidence about how well he’d done. At one point he said: “I don’t know how to say thanks to you, now I’ve shown my Dad that I’m not the piece of shit he thought I was.” I told Jed that his Dad ought to realise that it was him who was the piece of shit, not Jed. But Jed just said: “Well he had a hard life you know, his Dad used to beat him.” I suppose clichés come from the fact that they happen so often, but it’s still a toe curler. How can Jed say that and not realise what he’s saying, or maybe he does and just accepts it. It’s a mad world at times, and to think it was me who got sent of to a counsellor. Matt came in later with a congratulations card, I said: “But you don’t know what I got, do you?” He said: “No, but I knew you’d done well.” Sweet, but not sweet enough!!
I still can’t believe how well we’ve all done; we’ve been celebrating like anything. Claire is furious and keeps lurking about with her tail between her legs. We’re doing some more celebrating tonight, but first we have to work. Madge ended up being a bit of a bugger, we wanted to have tonight off but she said that we couldn’t, as she didn’t have cover. So first of all we’ve got to go and do a shift of standing looking interested at Funkster. I want to know some of the results that other people got, especially Jade, but wouldn’t lower myself to ask anyone.