It’s less than a week till the holiday, the whole house is in uproar, mum and Claire keep talking about what clothes they are taking and what they’ll wear in the evening as opposed to the day, that sort of mind numbingly dull prattle. They even went shopping together for new holiday clothes – I ask you, I can just imagine them skipping around the bikini department in Debenams saying, “Oh, do you think this will go with my sarong?†and then having minute discussions about cloth and colour. Mum asked me nervously if I wanted to go shopping with them. Of course, I was insulted, but managed a polite “no thanks,†because she was clearly worried that I would take up the offer and ruin the outing, but still asked. They brought stuff back for Andrew – what is it about males? Can they never buy their own clothes?