I’m really nervous about meeting Matt for coffee, we’re meeting at 7 in this café place in town. They try to pretend in there that they don’t mind if you just come in for coffee but they keep coming over and asking if you want to eat. It’s not the best place to meet, but it was the only thing that sprang to my mind at the time. I keep thinking about what I’m going to wear and all that sort of crap, at the same time I don’t want to buy into all that and I don’t see why I should make an effort, it’s not as if he’s worth it, but on another level I want to let him know what he’s missing, how pathetic is that? I keep wondering why I want to see him, why I agreed, but I think the main thing is that I just don’t feel it’s finished. I suppose that’s mainly because although I finished it as such, he made me do it, or really, he did it. He decided it wasn’t worth turning down a dirty grope with Janice. So I didn’t have the power, I just had to react to the situation and because it was unexpected, I wasn’t ready for it, so in my mind it wasn’t finished the way that you normally finish things. Arrrrrrrrrggggg, how can I waste so much time going over and over it?