Archive for November 12th, 2012

Monday, 12th November, 2012

I called for Imogen and she was ready and looked almost like she used to, except for seeming a bit paler and tired. We walked to school and didn’t say much, it was embarrassing when we got there, it was almost as if people stopped talking every time she was around, I felt badly because it didn’t help her that she was hanging around with me, that was almost as interesting in the zoo as the fact that she had come back at all. She couldn’t make it through the whole day though, she said she wanted to go home at lunchtime so I walked her back, when we got back to hers she just started crying and crying, it was terrible, she sounded like an animal in pain, she could hardly catch her breath and I had to try and give her a hug as she rocked backwards and forwards all hot and grieving. It took her over half an hour to cry out all her tears, she kept apologising about crying and saying that she tried not to and that she couldn’t cry in front of her dad because it was just as bad for him. I made her a cup of tea and secretly phoned mum at work, told her what had happened and asked her to phone the school and tell them I wasn’t coming back this afternoon. Mum asked if I

was all right and if I wanted her to come but I said no thanks that I’d be all right.

Imogen put brandy in her tea from their cabinet and that seemed to make her feel better. After that she was like someone who had been silent for years and had stored loads of things that just had to be said. She talked about her mum and what she’d been like and what a shock it was that she had died and that they’d had a row the day before, and that her dad wept downstairs every night when he thought that she was asleep and that she felt really, really lonely.

I am so crap at dealing with things like this, I should be good having seen the Samuels and Sallys in action, but I’m rubbish, I really wanted to help, but I couldn’t do anything other than listen and nod and try and say the odd thing. After a bit she suddenly stopped and I asked her if she wanted to go for a walk or have something to eat, but she said that she wanted to go to bed, but would I call for her again in the morning. When I got home I was totally knackered and mum was up for a huge grilling about the afternoon.