Archive for March 1st, 2013

Friday, 1st March, 2013

I had sex with Matt again last night, I’d said that I’d go to his house instead of going to the pub again – we went last night. Anyway, I kind of knew that we’d probably have sex, I wasn’t that sure if I wanted to or not, not for any reason, it’s just, oh – I don’t know what it is. We haven’t done it since the first time, and I know that Matt has hinted at us doing it again, but I avoided the question or a discussion on it. I just feel awkward and I don’t know if I made the right decision about doing it in the first place. Anyway, I knew I couldn’t put the issue off anymore, and I did have a conversation with Matt at his house, but it was one of the crappest conversation I’ve ever been involved in. I ended up burbling like a complete pratt and not saying what I wanted to say (mostly because I didn’t know what I wanted to say). Anyway, Matt said he couldn’t see much of a problem since we’d done it before and I could see what he meant, and I thought that we might as well give it another go, maybe the first time is always awkward and sore. This time wasn’t that different though, and I almost wish we’d never done it in the first place because it seems as if once you have you can’t go back to not having done it. The expectation is that you’ll do it all the time.